The Fading Dusk Page 8
To my surprise, the councilor started laughing. How come I’m yelled at when I laugh, but he’s allowed to? No one said a word; Aden still looked like he was about to be sick while the captain stood ramrod straight, hands behind his back. He hadn’t once spared me a glance, making me wonder if I’d imagined our conversation from earlier.
When the councilor finally controlled himself, he pointed at me. “What has the girl told you? Has she divulged the man’s secrets yet?”
Captain Leonid closed his eyes briefly, as if gearing himself up to speak. “She knows nothing, Councilor.”
That, unfortunately, happened to be precisely the wrong thing to say. The councilor drew himself up, screaming at all of us. His voice echoed off the walls, giving me a headache. Aden’s eyes looked as if they were about to pop from his head. I wondered if I could grab him and run; I’d rather hide in my cell than listen to Raynard scream.
“And you asked for this case—you practically begged for it,” he continued, addressing the captain. “And we granted it to you because we know how much you want that promotion, and you’ve done nothing but make a mess of it!”
I felt the blood drain from my face. Promotion? “What are you talking about?” I said, not caring that I was interrupting the councilor’s rant.
Raynard turned to me, smiling in wicked delight. “Oh, you don’t know? The captain is using you to get himself out of this godforsaken prison and into a higher position. Of course, that promotion won’t happen if Bantheir continues to run around Dusk killing people!”
I stared at Captain Leonid, who refused to meet my eye. “Is that true?”
He didn’t answer.
“You’re going about it all wrong, Leonid,” Raynard continued, oblivious to the way I was reacting. “All you had to do was make the girl sweet on you, and she’d spill all of her secrets—even the ones not about Bantheir. And if that didn’t work, you force her to speak.”
“Councilor, please—”
“There’s more than one way to make a woman talk,” he continued. “And you’d be getting something out of it, too. You need to learn to relax, Captain. You’re young, hot-blooded, you have needs. Why not use her to fulfill them?” He shot me a leer, making my skin crawl. “And then when you’ve gotten what you wanted out of her, you could toss her away.” He walked over to the captain, patting him on the shoulder. The captain didn’t react. He didn’t move, didn’t speak, didn’t even blink for that matter, just continued staring straight ahead of him. “She’s just some girl from the slums, isn’t that what you said?”
Vision tinted with red, I jumped to my feet shouting, “Is that true?!” Aden went to put a hand on my arm, either to restrain or comfort me, I wasn’t sure, but I shook him off. “Is that all I am, Captain? Some stupid poor girl who should have died on the streets? Oh, wait, no, if I had died, I wouldn’t have been able to help get you your stupid promotion! No wonder you kept insisting that I tell you everything! You didn’t care about me; you only cared about your selfish self!” I’d never felt so betrayed, so used before. How dare he! And what a fool I was, thinking I could trust him! You’re so stupid, Irina! The captain had shown his true colors from the moment we met, but all it took was a few kind words for me to forget the person he really was.
And yet he kept standing there, refusing to answer me. That only made me angrier, and I launched myself at him, only to be held back by Aden. “Answer me!” I struggled against Aden, but he was too strong for me. “You’re horrible! I hate you!”
That finally got a reaction from him. Looking at me, an unreadable expression on his face, he quietly said, “Aden, take her back to her cell. We’ll continue without her.” When Aden hesitated, he snapped, “Now, soldier!”
“Come on, Irina,” Aden said in my ear, pulling me away from the captain. Still, I struggled; I wanted to rake my nails across his face, punch him in the stomach, kick him in the knee—anything, to make me feel better. But Aden wouldn’t let go, and he succeeded in pulling me out into the hallway and back to my cell.
“I hate him,” I said again, collapsing to the floor. I covered my face with my hands and began sobbing.
“Irina…” Aden started to embrace me, but I pushed him away.
“I want to be alone.”
“But—”
“Go!”
He looked like his heart was breaking. “I had to listen to him, he’s my superior. You know I wouldn’t—I’d never betray you, Irina!”
“Did you know?” I hissed. “Did you know he was just using me to promote himself? And that he thinks of me that way, as just some girl from the slums?”
“No, I didn’t, I swear,” Aden insisted. He grabbed my shaking hands and cradled them against his chest, where I could feel his heart racing through his shirt. “I thought he was happy here. I mean, happy in his way happy, not happy like a normal person.” Aden paused, as if he realized he was rambling. “You know what I mean. I didn’t—what kind of person uses someone’s life to better their own? That’s sick! And to think he’s better than you, just because of where you were born?” He pounded his fist against the floor, frustrated. “That goes against everything we’re supposed to believe in as soldiers! I can’t believe he would feel that way.”
“He didn’t deny it,” I pointed out, tears running down my face and splattering against his pants. “He didn’t deny any of it, Aden. I thought I could trust him. I’m such an idiot!”
Aden swept me into his embrace, startling me. I tried to fight him, but he was too strong and it felt too nice. Collapsing, I cried on his shoulder as I hugged him tightly. He rocked me back and forth, whispering words of comfort in my ear.
I wished his solace was enough, but it wasn’t. Nothing would fix this.
Nothing.
“Lark.”
I jolted awake. After Aden left, I’d cried for what felt like hours, but sometime in the middle of the night, I must have fallen asleep. I was sitting on the floor, my knees pulled to my chest, my back resting against the wall. Every joint ached; I turned my neck back and forth a few times, wincing. Looking up, I saw the captain standing in front of the cell, his face masked in shadows.
I ignored him.
“Lark, give me a chance to explain.” His voice was soft as a breeze, to keep from waking the other prisoners. I, on the other hand, felt like screaming at the top of my lungs. Crying myself to sleep hadn’t done much in the way of calming me down. Whenever I thought back to what Raynard had said, and how the captain hadn’t even bothered to dispute it, my body was flooded with heat. I’d never been so angry in my entire life.
Is this what betrayal feels like? It was horrible.
The captain wrapped his long fingers around the bars. “Come on, Lark.”
“I have nothing to say to you. Go away. Leave me alone.”
He sighed. Resting his head against the bars, he said, “You are the most infuriating woman I have ever met.”
I bit back a nasty response that involved language I’d picked up from the traders in the marketplace.
“Look, it’s true I’m in line for a promotion, but that’s not why I asked to be put in charge of this case. I want to find out the truth as much as you do—maybe even more so.”
I was dying to ask him why—in fact, the words were at the tip of my tongue, but then I reminded myself what he’d told Raynard about me. Just a girl from the slums. Whenever I’d admitted I was from the slums, I’d been met with stares and ridicule, like I was somehow less than everyone else who’d been born and raised in Way. The captain, it seemed, was the same. I turned my face away, staring at the floor. Silence fell on us like a heavy cloak.
“Lark—”
“Don’t you get it? I don’t care. I meant what I said, Captain. You’re a horrible person, and I hate you. Now go away. Let me rot in here in peace.” I spoke to the floor, squeezing my eyes shut when I felt tears forming. How did I have any left? I prayed he would leave before he saw the tears, lest he think I was crying over him.
Why? I couldn’t help but wonder. Why does he want to solve this mystery so badly?
THEY LEFT ME ALONE THE following day. I waited, my nerves shot, convinced someone was going to come in and behead me like Raynard had ordered. But while soldiers walked in and out of the room, none of them paid me much heed. Even when they delivered my meals, they barely glanced my way. I didn’t have much of an appetite, but I knew starving myself wouldn’t help me in any way.
At night, when the soldiers turned down the flames on the gas lamps and the sky outside the small windows was as black as the shadows that haunted me, I curled up on the bed, my back to the room. Coreen called out a sleepy goodnight, which I answered half-heartedly as I stared at the crumbling brick wall. She’d tried all day to bring me out of my dark mood, but nothing she said or did worked. The only thing I could focus on was the captain’s betrayal, which left a bitter taste in the back of my mouth. His betrayal and his words from the previous night both swirled around my head, leaving me more confused than ever. I didn’t know what to believe anymore. Or who. Obviously, I was a poor judge of character. I was either too stupid or too naïve, or maybe a little bit of both. As I lay there, waiting for sleep to claim me and take me away from the constant torrent of doubts that flooded my head, I couldn’t help but hate myself a little.
When the door to my cell creaked open, I jumped. Lifting my head, I peered over my shoulder, brushing my dirty curls out of my face. At first I didn’t recognize the darkened figure, but when he spoke my name, I realized it was Aden.
“What are you doing?” I whispered, swinging my legs over the side of the bed and standing. I hadn’t seen Aden all day and had missed him. He, at least, was someone I could count on to support me. He might not be able to rescue me, but he could at least save me from my misery.
For a small amount of time, anyway.
“I’ve been thinking about you all day,” he confessed, stepping up to me. His green eyes looked black in the dark, but I could see the familiar smile on his face. I found myself relaxing, and Aden seemed to take this as a cue to embrace me. I let him, even hugging him back briefly. He smelled of sweat and smoke, of the night air and Dusk. It was a familiar, comforting smell, and I almost didn’t want to pull away. When we did, he searched my face. “How are you holding up?”
I shrugged. I didn’t know how to tell him how it felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest and torn into little pieces. I didn’t understand why it felt that way myself, so how could I describe it to Aden?
“This is horrible.” He cupped my face in his hands, tilting my head up. Our faces were so close, only inches separated our lips. My heart started pounding in my chest. What was happening? “I wish I could do something, anything, for you, Irina.” There was sadness etched across his face.
“You have,” I told him. “I’m sorry if I haven’t really told you how much everything you’ve done for me has helped.” Now I reached up and touched his face. “Because it has, Aden. Helped, I mean. Without your kindness…” I shook my head. Without his kindness, it would just be the captain’s cruelty, and I didn’t think I could last long against that.
“Maybe I could help in another way.” He took a step closer, so close that our bodies were touching at our shoulders, chest, and legs. I felt a blush spread across my cheeks; I’d never been this close to a man before.
So I wasn’t entirely prepared when he lowered his head and brushed his warm lips against mine.
I froze. Aden had expressed an interest in me from the start, but I hadn’t imagined the shy, blushing boy to make such a bold move. What had I expected, then? Hand holding and courting that eventually led to a sweet goodnight kiss in front of my door?
Actually, that sounded rather nice.
Aden didn’t seem to mind my lack of response, kissing me with an enthusiasm and boldness I hadn’t expected him to possess. I felt uncomfortable but was afraid if I pushed him away, I’d anger my one true friend.
I needed Aden’s support, his strength, his kindness—on my own, and I would crumble.
But when he tried to deepen the kiss, parting my mouth open with his while his hands began roaming across my body, I put my hands on his chest and shoved him away as hard as I could. “Aden, stop.”
“Irina?” Confusion clouded his face. He reached for me, and I backed away, my back hitting the brick wall. “Don’t—Don’t be scared. I’m not going to hurt you. I just—” He gestured vaguely. “I thought you wanted this?”
My face flamed. Did I? I had enjoyed our harmless flirting—when it was only harmless. But Aden had crossed an invisible line, moving things a lot faster than I was comfortable with. I hadn’t managed to enjoy any of it, not when I was scared out of my mind. “I-I don’t know,” I admitted.
Hurt flashed across his features. “But I want this. I’ve wanted it for a long time, Irina. I went to all of your shows. I’ve been supporting you since you were brought here. Why are you pushing me away?” Aden closed the distance between us with a few short steps, putting his hands on my shoulders, and I flinched, turning my head away and grazing my cheek against a sharp, broken brick. I felt something warm trickling down my face. “Irina!”
He caught my chin and tilted my face sideways; half-blinded with fear, I responded by kicking him in shins. “I said stop!” My raised voice woke Coreen, who started yelling for the guards.
“Irina,” Aden said again, his voice a mixture of misery and guilt. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt you—”
Suddenly, a hand grabbed Aden by the shoulder and shoved him backward. He crashed against the front of the cell, the impact so hard it caused the bars to shake with a loud rattle. A man stepped between us; with a jolt, I realized it was Captain Leonid.
He raised a fist and started beating Aden. “Don’t touch her again!” He punched Aden again and again, and Aden helplessly covered his face with his hands, his body a crumpled form on the floor. “You’re a disgrace, soldier!”
Despite being scared out of my wits, I had enough presence of mind to realize if I didn’t do something, the captain was going to beat Aden to death. Jumping forward, I grabbed his arm before he could strike again and shouted, “Stop!”
He whirled on me, murder on his face as our eyes locked. His body was coiled like a snake, stiff and tense and ready to fight. I winced, afraid he’d start hitting me, but still I held on to his arm. “You’re going to kill him!”
A myriad of emotions passed across the captain’s face, more than I’d ever seen since meeting him. It was shocking to see him like that, as if his perfect mask had just shattered. Finally, it settled back in place, but I could still see anger blazing in his eyes. He gave me a curt nod and took a step back, away from Aden’s broken body. After a moment’s hesitation, I released his arm.
Before I could speak, more soldiers poured into the room. They ran up to my cell. “Captain?”
“Get him out of my sight,” he spat, indicating Aden with a jab of his chin. They complied without a word, practically carrying Aden out of the room. I caught sight of his bloody face and winced. What had just happened? In the span of a single heartbeat, everything had shattered, broken beyond repair.
Was it somehow my fault?
The captain turned to me once more, scrutinizing me with his hot and dark gaze. “You’re hurt,” he said, the anger that had laced his words only moments before gone. I blinked in surprise. He was speaking kindly, as if I were an injured kitten he was trying to lure into his arms with the promise of fre
sh milk.
I backed away. I’d had enough of being tricked by men. “I’m fine. Go away.”
He shut his eyes and tiredly rubbed his face with his hand. “No. Come with me.” He stepped toward the doorway. When I didn’t budge, he made a noise of impatience. “Lark. Either come with me or I’m carrying you. You choose.”
The thought of him carrying me in his arms sent a hot flush throughout my body, along with an icy cold stab of fear. How dare he, after what I’d just been through! If he thought he could just put his hands on me too, he was out of his mind.
Crossing my arms over my chest protectively, I followed him wordlessly.
CAPTAIN LEONID LED ME TO his quarters, opening the door and gesturing for me to go in first. I stopped short in my tracks, staring at him. The corridor was lit with gas lamps, making it easy to see his face. He no longer looked angry, just… upset.
“You’re hurt,” the captain said again, as if that explained why he wanted me to go into his quarters. He made a noise of exasperation when I didn’t speak. “Let me help you, Lark! I’m not going to harm you!”
“P-Promise?” I was furious that my voice shook, but I was too tired and scared to pretend to be stronger than I actually was tonight. I’d just watched him beat someone. The captain had always seemed so in control of his emotions, but tonight I’d seen a scary side of him.
His face softened. “Promise. No one will ever hurt you again, Lark. I swear it.”
We locked eyes in the corridor, the sound of my rapid heartbeat filling my ears. Finally, I nodded and stepped over the threshold, hoping I wasn’t making a mistake.
The room was lit up by two gas lamps placed on a long oak desk that took up most of the space. Two chairs sat on either side of desk, and there were piles of papers, all neatly sorted, covering every inch of the desk. Some piles were nearly a foot high, and I wondered if the captain devoted most of his day—and night—to reading through each and every sheet.
A large map of Dusk hung on one wall. The dots, now four of them, had been drawn in, and pieces of paper containing scribbles of notes were pinned to map. I made to move toward the map to read the notes, but the captain directed me to one of the chairs.